“Hindsight is a gift” - An autoethnographic exploration of coming outs in Aotearoa and its impact on health and wellbeing.

Abstract

Coming out of the closet, or more simply known as coming out refers to the process in which
a rainbow individual discloses their gender or sexuality that affirms their subjective identity.
Being out and expressing rainbow identity can challenge the ongoing prevalence of
cisheteronormativity within society. Limited research identifies how coming out
impacts the health and wellbeing of rainbow communities within the Aotearoa context. In
Aotearoa, rainbow communities experience inequities that can be attributed to various social
determinants including accessibility, violence, discrimination, erasure and exclusion. This
dissertation seeks to address this lack of research by exploring how coming out impacts
rainbow communities in Aotearoa through an autoethnographic account of the experiences of
a young rainbow person. A qualitative, critical and interpretivist paradigm underpins this
inquiry utilising the conceptual frameworks of minority stress, intersectionality, and health
promotion. The analysis is centred around compact exploratory autoethnographic tales of my
coming out experiences that explore connections between coming out as a sociocultural
phenomenon and the health and wellbeing of people who are a part of the rainbow
community in Aotearoa. While most experiences of coming out differ from person to person,
some inter-subjective accounts of these experiences are shared between individuals, and can
be attributed to broader sociocultural context/s, literature, media and observation. This
autoethnographic study uses various data collection methods including artifacts, literature and
media to contribute to understanding the coming out process and its impact on health and
wellbeing. The findings in this inquiry suggest that coming out is a taxing process both
intrinsically and extrinsically when considering the motivation to disclose or conceal one’s
rainbow identity and the context people come out to. There is a need to avoid simplistic
understandings of coming out as either a one-off positive or negative experience as this will
perpetuate further harm and homogenise lived experiences that are instead subjective and
multi-faceted realities. Rather this inquiry argues that coming out is a nuanced process that is
strategic, ongoing, complex, and sometimes contradictory. Coming out constitutes a minority
stress as it is a necessary process for rainbow people who are navigating a cisheteronormative
society. The findings of this inquiry provide insights into how education and healthcare
settings maintain cisheteronormativity and offer recommendations that inform future
policy and service development to improve health and wellbeing outcomes and reduce
inequities for rainbow communities in Aotearoa.

Date of Award	2023
Original language	English